Pet Care 101
by Nbsiren
Summary: Small snippets of life between owner and pet...
1. Leash

Title: Pet Care 101.1 - Leash  
Author: Nbsiren  
Rating: PG  
Pairing: Asami x Akihito  
Spoilers: none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Total crack, no plot.  
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Yamane Ayano. Other characters are mine.  
Author's note: I blame mistressdi and that pic she posted for inflaming the plot bunnies minds with this crack fic.

* * *

Everyone knows that when you take your pet out in public one must be sure that it has a collar, id tag, and be on a leash.

Which is how Asami made his entrance for an old acquaintance's party with his adorable kitten.

Of course said kitten was glaring at him.

Dressed in tight leather pants that hugged his lean legs and showed off his perfect ass, tight black tank top that fit him like a glove, and a jeweled collar.

The collar of course had a tag embedded into it telling anyone that got close enough to read it just who he belonged to.

Not that he allowed many close to his pet.

Attached to the ring on his collar a leash was attached, Asami himself holding the other end.

He goes around greeting some of the other guests, all the while making sure his pet didn't wander off. He kept the leash firmly in his hand.

Signaling one of his guards that was following discreetly, the guard goes over to the buffet table to fill a plate.

The guard takes the plate over to a table, sets it down and moves to stand nearby.

Asami soon makes his way to the table, sits down and pulls his pet onto his lap.

Smirking at his pet's mumbled complaint, he strokes his pet's hair and says, "Go ahead and eat."

Not waiting to be told again, his kitten digs into the food.

After he finishes, they get up and Asami takes them over to another table.

One of his guards hands him a package which Asami takes and hands to an older man sitting at the table.

After some words, Asami turns and they make their way out.

Once in the limo, Akihito turns to Asami and says, "Take this off me."

Pulling on the leash, Akihito finds himself on Asami's lap.

"You did good tonight my pet. When we get back home I'll give you your reward."

"I went to the party, take the collar off."

"When we get home. After all pet owners shouldn't unleash their pets until the pet is inside the home."

Asami only smirks when Akihito growls at him.


	2. Bathing

Title: Pet Care 101.2 - Bathing  
Author: Nbsiren  
Rating: PG-13  
Pairing: Asami x Akihito  
Spoilers: none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Total crack, no plot.  
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Yamane Ayano. Other characters are mine.  
Author's note: I blame mistressdi for the start of these cracky fics~

* * *

After three rounds of sex, his pet still looked sexy but he also needed cleaning up.

Going into the bathroom he fills the tub and goes back out to the bedroom for his kitten.

Lifting his pet out of the bed, he carries him into the bathroom and places him into the tub.

He hears the little groan that escapes his pet as the water starts to soak into his sore muscles.

Lathering up a washcloth, he cleans his pet up, also making sure to shampoo and condition his hair.

After rinsing off his pet, he unplugs the tub, lifts his pet out and dries him off with a big fluffy towel.

Taking him back into the bedroom he places him back on the bed, and covers him with the blanket.

He watches as he curls up and he smirks as he hears his name whispered just as his Akihito settles back into his sleep.

Knowing his pet is well satisfied, cleaned up and needs his sleep, Asami gets into the bed.

_Pet care is very important._

He doesn't have to wait long before his kitten is snuggling into him, curling up at his side.


	3. Grooming

Title: Pet Care 101.3 - Grooming  
Author: Nbsiren  
Rating: PG  
Pairing: Asami x Akihito  
Spoilers: none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Total crack, no plot.  
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Yamane Ayano. Other characters are mine.  
Author's note: I blame mistressdi for the start of these cracky fics~

* * *

Watching his pet go around the room picking up their discarded clothes was...entertaining.

He watches as he puts the clothes in the hamper and then goes to the dresser for boxers and socks.

Going to the closet he gets a pair of vintage jeans and a t-shirt.

Dressed, he grabs a comb off the dresser and drags it through his hair.

He hears him muttering about needing to go and make a salon appointment for his hair.

Getting up he goes over and pulls his kitten into his arms, ignoring the hissing, he runs his fingers through his hair.

Inhaling, he enjoys the unique scent that is his to savor.

Letting his kitten go he hears, "I'll be done early today."

He smirks as his pet races out of the bedroom.

He makes a note to have Kirishima look into investing in salons.

After all investing in the grooming care of your pet is another way an owner shows care for his pet.


	4. Feeding

Title: Pet Care 101.4 - Feeding  
Author: Nbsiren  
Rating: PG  
Pairing: Asami x Akihito  
Spoilers: none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Total crack, no plot.  
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Yamane Ayano. Other characters are mine.  
Author's note: I blame mistressdi for the start of these cracky fics~

* * *

Sitting down at the restaurant, Asami barely glances at the menu before he orders dinner.

He looks as his pet looks around, watching as the staff moves around the floor, checking to see if he recognizes any of the other diners, and looking at the different foods at the other tables.

Their food is brought over on a cart.

Asami points to the plates that are his and the rest go over in front of Akihito.

After giving thanks Akihito begins eating.

Asami knows that his kitten had a small breakfast sandwich on his way to work that morning and a couple of ramen cups he managed to eat while between photo shoots.

As active as his pet is he knows those tiny meals were not enough to fill him up.

It was amusing to see people look over and watch his pet eat.

He would make sure any weight gained would be in the right places and that his pet would get the necessary exercise needed to keep in shape.

Of course between running around for all his jobs and their rigorous bedroom exercise he didn't have to worry about it too much.

He knew every inch of his pet. If anything was wrong he would know it right away.

Sitting back he lets Akihito order his own dessert.

Smirking as he knows just how his pet will taste later on.

After all there's only one dessert he himself enjoys.


	5. Outdoor Cat vs Indoor Cat

Title: Pet Care 101.5 - Outdoor cat vs. Indoor cat  
Author: Nbsiren  
Rating: PG  
Pairing: Asami x Akihito  
Spoilers: none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Total crack, no plot.  
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Yamane Ayano. Other characters are mine.  
Author's note: I blame mistressdi for the start of these cracky fics~

* * *

Sitting in his private room overlooking his club's floor, he enjoys the sight of his pet on the dance floor.

Compared to the other tamed pets his wild kitten shined.

Contemplating he realized his pet shined even compared to wild pets.

Looking at his pet he can see why his out shines the tamed ones.

Taming your pet means you know what it'll do, you know what to expect. He doesn't want to tame his kitten but he will train him.

After all always knowing what to expect gets boring, and he doesn't like to be bored.

Compared to other wild pets he knows why his out shines them too.

His pet may be wild but at least he KNOWS where his kitten came from, where he's been, with who he's been with, and that his kitten would never willingly bed another.

Who knows where and with who the other wild cats go to scratch their itches when their owners neglect them.

He makes sure he takes care of his kitten's itches and other needs quite well and frequently...

Smirking, he signals a guard to go get his pet.

His Akihito was the right blend of outdoor and indoor kitten...perfect for him.


	6. Potential Dangers of Cat Toys

Title: Pet Care 101.6 - Potential Dangers of Cat Toys  
Author: Nbsiren  
Rating: PG  
Pairing: Asami x Akihito  
Spoilers: none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Total crack, no plot.  
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Yamane Ayano. Other characters are mine.  
Author's note: I blame mistressdi for the start of these cracky fics~

* * *

He knows his pet is hiding something from him.

After all, he does know how to read his body language very well indeed.

And his kitten's body language is telling him he's anxious to leave the penthouse.

No doubt he's got a stakeout to get to...one he doesn't want him to know about.

His kitten will realize one day that trying to keep him from finding out is futile. He'll find out one way or another.

Kirishima has already figured out his pet needs watching over when he goes outside to play and the men he's assigned to protect him know enough that should his pet get hurt on their watch they'll end up in a room they might not walk out of.

He knows very well the dangers Akihito's toys can lead to.

After all his kitten's toys is how they met, and Asami knows just how dangerous he is.

His pet is lucky that his owner's dangerous nature is known by his rivals and enemies and they wouldn't hurt his pet...much. They knew the retaliation would be their deaths should his pet get any serious injuries while in their 'care'.

The only ones he worried about were the ones who were small time, those not caring in whose territory they did business, fools might hurt his kitten in their ignorance.

As long as his kitten played outside, he would keep up on the potential dangers he could get into with his toys.


	7. GPS for Pets

Title: Pet Care 101.7 - GPS for Pets  
Author: Nbsiren  
Rating: PG  
Pairing: Asami x Akihito  
Spoilers: none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Total crack, no plot.  
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Yamane Ayano. Other characters are mine.  
Author's note: I blame mistressdi for the start of these cracky fics~

* * *

Cell phone, camera bag, his hoodies, his ball caps, a couple of his cameras, and all his shoes...

He smirked, if his pet only knew he had GPS chips placed in his things...

He could see his pet's location on an app on his PDA.

After all it was his responsibility as an owner to make sure his pet didn't wander out of the boundaries set for him.

His pet knows full well he would be punished for going where he's not supposed to.

Seeing the dot move across the map, he sees that his pet is moving towards home.

He had contemplated having a GPS chip surgically implanted in his pet. Research into them however showed the too high cancer risk and he rejected that idea. He refused to risk his pet's health.

So for the time being he would have to be content with placing chips within his pet's toys and clothing.

Seeing the dot just reaching the building, he waits a couple minutes and then dials the penthouse.

He smirks as he hears his kitten's breathless greeting, and imagines another kind of breathless greeting...


	8. Missing Pets

Title: Pet Care 101.8 - Missing Pets  
Author: Nbsiren  
Rating: PG  
Pairing: Asami x Akihito  
Spoilers: none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Total crack, no plot.  
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Yamane Ayano. Other characters are mine.  
Author's note: I blame mistressdi for the start of these cracky fics~

* * *

When his pet failed to show up for their planned lunch and the guards assigned to him failed to answer their phones, Asami brought out his PDA and started up the app for his pet's GPS.

He locates his pet at a warehouse owned by one of his rivals.

He tells Suoh to get the car and Kirishima to reschedule some appointments.

Once in the limo he gets out his cell phone and makes a call.

"Inoue-san, you've taken something that belongs to me."

"Asami-san, well I do have two of your men, they attacked my men for no reason, so they were...invited to join us."

"My men don't attack unless they have no choice or they are protecting what I order them to protect. Since they are assigned to watch over my pet, seeing your men attack him would cause them to attack your men."

"Your...your pet?"

"Yes, my pet...Takaba Akihito. Should he be hurt the price you pay may just be your life."

_No one will get away with taking my pet. I'll always do what it takes to get him back._


	9. Questions for the Vet

Title: Pet Care 101.9 - Questions for the Vet  
Author: Nbsiren  
Rating: PG  
Pairing: Asami x Akihito  
Spoilers: none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Total crack, no plot.  
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Yamane Ayano. Other characters are mine.  
Author's note: I blame mistressdi for the start of these cracky fics~

* * *

Laying his kitten down on their bed, he hears the little moans and mews coming from him.

Covering him with the blanket he waits for his personal doctor to arrive.

When the doctor comes in Asami tells him what he needs to know.

After examining him and drawing some blood the doctor tells him, "The drug's effects will wear off in a couple hours. It doesn't look like they beat him, the bruising looks like it could be when they grabbed him and subdued him to tie him up. A couple days of rest and he'll be fine."

"And the other matter?"

Reaching into his bag the doctor brings out some pamphlets and hands them to Asami.

"Those should help with weight, size, and body mass ratio questions you have. I would like him to gain just a few more pounds. He's just a tad bit under."

"Nutrition?"

"That is something a dietary specialist would be able to answer. A very good one works at the hospital, I'll get the information from him and get it to you."

"Alright."

After the doctor leaves, he goes into the bathroom and starts the shower.

Going back out to the bedroom he strips his pet and carries him into the bathroom.

He washes, dries, and puts his kitten back in the bed.

Changing clothes he goes and gives orders to the guards outside, then leaves to take care of Inoue and his men.


	10. Cleaning Pet Messes

Title: Pet Care 101.10 - Cleaning Pet Messes  
Author: Nbsiren  
Rating: PG-13  
Pairing: Asami x Akihito  
Spoilers: none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Total crack, no plot.  
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Yamane Ayano. Other characters are mine.  
Author's note: I blame mistressdi for the start of these cracky fics~

* * *

Arriving at the warehouse, Asami goes over to where Inoue and his men were caged.

Nodding to his men they go in and a couple of them get Inoue and take him over to a nearby room.

Asami turns and goes to the office, ignoring what his men were doing in the cage.

Asami closes the door behind him and hears Inoue say, "Asami-san, I didn't know he was yours! All I needed was to get the pictures he took a few days ago! That's all, I swear!"

"So you knew who took the pictures and where to find him, but saying you didn't know that he belongs to me is a lie."

"It's not a lie!"

"Then why send five of your men after one photographer? Perhaps you saw the men following him and didn't want them getting to him first. You should have done your research to find out why he was being followed. You would have found the answer easily. Unless you already knew I had men following him and didn't care to find out why."

"I...I..."

"You were in a rush and didn't want to bother with finding out details. Though you claim you wanted to get pictures that he had taken, giving him an aphrodisiac makes me believe otherwise."

Nodding to Suoh, Asami leaves the room as Suoh steps forward to take care of Inoue.

Going out to the limo, he gives orders to go back to the penthouse.

Arriving at the penthouse he tells Kirishima, "Bring any paper work that needs my attention to my study. I'll go over it in a bit."

"Yes, Asami-sama."

He turns and gets on the private elevator in the underground garage.


	11. Bonding With Your Pet

Title: Pet Care 101.11 - Bonding with your Pet  
Author: Nbsiren  
Rating: M  
Pairing: Asami x Akihito  
Spoilers: none  
Warnings: smex  
Summary: Total crack, no plot.  
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Yamane Ayano. Other characters are mine.  
Author's note: I blame mistressdi for the start of these cracky fics~

* * *

Entering the bedroom, Asami knows the drug should have just hit it's peak when he sees his pet.

Blanket tossed to the side, one hand playing with one of his nipples and the other wrapped around his cock.

He hears his pet whimper in frustration.

Stripping he grabs a bottle of lube from a drawer and goes over to the bed.

Coating his fingers, he teases the muscled ring of his Akihito.

"Yes! Put them in! Nnn...sooo...good...more!"

He adds a second finger in and aims for his kitten's sweet spot.

"Ahh! Yes! There! Asami!"

Smirking at his Akihito's wildness, he adds another finger inside. He feels Akihito arch his back as he tries to impale himself on Asami's fingers.

"A...Asami..." *whimpers* "inside..." *moaning* "me..." *panting*

Mewing whimpers spill from Akihito as Asami removes his fingers.

Lifting Akihito's legs over his shoulders, he seats himself to the hilt in one thrust.

"Asami! *whimpers of pleasure* "Nnn...faster!" *heavy panting and moaning* "deeper!"

Groaning Akihito covers his bright red face.

Asami shuts the recording off. "I told you that you begged me for it last night didn't I?"

"You didn't need to film us!"

Pulling Akihito to him he says, "This way we can watch it together or when I have to go away on business trips, we can watch our copies and I can make you cum on the phone."

"Wait...you made copies!?"

"Of course! One for us to watch here, one for you and me when I'm away, I've sent it to my laptop to watch between meetings...or even during meetings...some are just boring to sit through, a copy is on my PDA..."

A/N: Asami takes bonding with your pet to a whole nother level...


	12. Litter Box

Title: Pet Care 101.12 - Litter Box  
Author: Nbsiren  
Rating: PG-13  
Pairing: Asami x Akihito  
Spoilers: none  
Warnings: language  
Summary: Total crack, no plot.  
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Yamane Ayano. Other characters are mine.  
Author's note: I blame mistressdi for the start of these cracky fics~

* * *

Entering the penthouse, Asami goes straight to the bedroom, only to make his way to the bathroom.

The cleaning crew had come and he wanted to make sure they had placed the items he had wanted.

Seeing two new shelves placed near the shower, he went to look over the items.

Jars of cream, gel, lotion, oil, and bottles of lube were stocked on the shelves.

A similar set up was placed near the tub.

Going over to the sink, he sees the basket restocked with bottles of flavored lube...for when his kitten was extra frisky.

He checks to make sure the mirror above the sink was clean.

After all, making sure his kitten could see himself taking Asami to the hilt was a turn on for both of them.

Going back out to the bedroom, he goes to the walk-in closet.

He hears the front door close and footsteps race across the penthouse floor.

Akihito runs in, dashes over to the bathroom, and slams the door behind him.

Smirking when he hears the door lock, he waits a couple minutes then goes over and unlocks the door.

Curious to see which area his kitten decided they would play at had him opening the door. Only to see him standing at the toilet.

Still...seeing his kitten standing there, holding himself was hot...

**2 hours later**

Soaking in the tub, Akihito glares at Asami, muttering "pervert," brought the smirk back to his face.

"You were feeling neglected weren't you?"

"What the hell!? I was going to the bathroom! I even locked the door! You're the pervert! Grabbing me while I was at the toilet and then...then you..."

Smirking, Asami takes his lips in a kiss.


	13. Nutrition

Title: Pet Care 101.13 - Nutrition  
Author: Nbsiren  
Rating: PG-13  
Pairing: Asami x Akihito  
Spoilers: none  
Warnings: language  
Summary: Total crack, no plot.  
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Yamane Ayano. Other characters are mine.  
Author's note: I blame mistressdi for the start of these cracky fics~

* * *

Reading one of the pamphlets his personal doctor had given him from the specialist at the hospital, Asami made a list of things for Kirishima to look into.

He knows his kitten likes to eat cereal but is the kind he stocks for his pet considered the fortified kind mentioned in the pamphlet...

He sees Akihito drink milk, juice, water, soda, and tea. He knows he drinks alcohol when he and his friends go out at times, but having a drunk kitten mewing and talking freely was a bonus for him.

He certainly ate seafood, sushi was his kitten's favorite for him to bring home.

He makes a note to look into whole grains.

**A couple weeks later**

Asami stares at the bowl in front of him.

"What? You had Kirishima get boxes of it so I figured that's what you wanted to eat."

"You know I don't eat cereal."

"I'm not the one that asked for it to be bought. If you don't eat it, it's a waste, cause I'm sure as hell not eating it."

"Why not? It's good for you."

"That's only if you can stand eating that stuff. It tastes like crap."

"Is that any way to talk about healthy food?"

"Go ahead, I dare you to eat that whole bowl."

"When I do I get to name something I want from you."

Akihito thinks for a bit then says, "Fine, but if you don't eat the whole bowl I get to name something I want from you."

"Deal."

**The next day**

Asami finished eating his breakfast then sat back to watch Akihito finish his bowl of Frosted Flakes.

Akihito gets up, sets his bowl in the sink and rushes out to get his bag to get to the photo shoot scheduled that morning.

Kirishima about to knock pauses as Akihito opens the door to go out.

Going in he goes right to the kitchen to clean up while Asami finishes his morning coffee.

Pointing to the boxes packed in plastic bags Asami says, "Get rid of those, give them away, I don't care what you do with them."

Though he would never say so, he had to agree with Akihito...it did indeed taste like crap.


	14. Aging

Title: Pet Care 101.14 - Aging  
Author: Nbsiren  
Rating: PG-13  
Pairing: Asami x Akihito  
Spoilers: none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Total crack, no plot.  
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Yamane Ayano. Other characters are mine.  
Author's note: I blame mistressdi for the start of these cracky fics~

* * *

He waited to feel his kitten snuggle against him before he took his turn to relax and drift into sleep.

He would never tire of sexing up his Akihito, of hearing the delicious sounds he made during their playtime. Of feeling him snuggle against him before settling into sleep.

Never tire of his fight back spirit, his wildness, determination, his fire.

He looked forward to seeing his kitten grow, always by his side just as he is.

Just between being awake and asleep an image of Akihito grown and by his side popped into his mind.

Smirking as he slides into sleep, he grabs onto that image and dreams of future playtime with his kitten.


	15. Your Will and Your Cat

Title: Pet Care 101.15 - Your Will and Your Cat  
Author: Nbsiren  
Rating: PG-13  
Pairing: Asami x Akihito  
Spoilers: none  
Warnings: none  
Summary: Total crack, no plot.  
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Yamane Ayano. Other characters are mine.  
Author's note: I blame mistressdi for the start of these cracky fics~

* * *

Placing the file in his safe, he closes it and nods to Kirishima and Suoh. They bow and leave the office.

Once outside the office, Suoh asks in a low voice, "Do you think Takaba knows just how much Asami-sama cares for him?"

"Deep down I think he does, I think he still acts defiant because Asami-sama isn't one to talk about feelings."

They go quiet when the door opens and Takaba comes in.

They wave him inside Asami's office and breathe a sigh when the door closes behind him.

Going over to the couch, Akihito sits down, waiting for Asami to finish up so they could go out for their dinner.

Akihito gets up when Asami comes over and they walk out and get into the limo.

Of course Asami's cell phone rings, so Akihito just sighs and lays his head on Asami's lap.

Asami threads his fingers through his kitten's hair, both relaxing with the familiar action.

Partway to the restaurant the limo suddenly jerks to a stop, Asami quickly holding onto Akihito with one arm and his free hand grabbing the safety bar over the door. The lap belt helps keep them in the seat.

Akihito sits up and burrows himself into Asami's side, one hand on Asami's chest, reassuring himself that Asami was ok.

Asami maneuvers one arm around Akihito holding him close and they don't have to wait long before Suoh's voice comes through a speaker.

"Sorry Asami-sama, someone ran the red light just now and caused an accident. Kirishima had to stop fast in order to avoid hitting anyone in front of us."

Lowering the divider, Asami asks, "Either of you hurt?"

"No Asami-sama. I've already contacted emergency services about the accident."

Looking at Akihito he sees him eying his camera bag.

Kissing the top of his head he says, "Suoh take Akihito over so he can get some pictures. We won't be moving until emergency services gets here to handle it."

After getting back in the limo, Akihito gets out his laptop and sends the pictures into the newspaper.

Stuff put back in his bag, he lays back down on the seat, head once again on Asami's lap, one of his hands stroking Asami's thigh.

One of Asami's hands slides down the back of Akihito's jeans to tease him.

Akihito doesn't even notice the divider go back up.

Both Kirishima and Suoh stare straight ahead watching as emergency services arrive and starts dealing with the accident.

They ignore the muffled sounds coming from the back of the limo.

Both of them thankful that neither Asami nor Takaba were hurt.

Neither wanted to think about the papers Asami had made with the lawyer and had stored away.

Both of them silently vowing to do everything they could to protect Asami and Takaba.

Because really...the world really was a safer place while both of them were alive and having fun like bunnies in the back of the limo...the restaurant...the penthouse...the office...the boat...and anywhere else bunnies could have fun...

**THE END**


End file.
